[young Jenny's father is chasing her through the fields to beat her when she stops and hides]
Young Jenny Curran: Dear God, make me a bird. So I could fly far. Far far away from here.
(from the movie: Forrest Gump)
Have you ever had days when you just feel so meloncholy? So overwhelmed with work that you just do not know where to start?!
My job is my main priority, especially now that I have those deadlines to meet. Spring break will have to be spent doing paperwork instead of enjoying myself. Work always seems to take over my life. How many times have I had to put my diet on hold? How many times have I had to put my love life on hold? How many times have I had to put my vacation on hold? All that stress, pushes me deeper and deeper into The Glass Box. I feel trapped. I feel so overwhelmed.
Yes, just like Jenny, sometimes you just want to go and hide somewhere, anywhere where no one will find you. But the problem is that your problems will still be there. Running away is not the answer.
The cruel reality is that being an adult means to be responsible. How stupid would it be to let go of my responsibilities and end up in poverty again. I have lost everything and had to start over again and again. Do I really want to face that kind of music again?! Do I really want to be homeless again? Do I really want to go back to rags again? Do I really want to go back to nothing again? I may not have much, but do I really want to give up what I have worked so hard for again? What is the key word?!... "again." And no, again is not "a gain." I would gain nothing from that!!!!! That would just be stupidity talking to me in the face.
All crisises are temporary.
"You must do that which you think you cannot do." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt
P.S. Open House is coming up in March. I spent two hours at Wal-Mart developing pictures and making 8x10s of some of my students. (That's what I get for going to Wal-Mart on a Saturday!!!) I will need to take more pictures of the other groups, so I can get them developed asap. I wish I could add the pictures to my journal, but confidentiality, ya know... I used gorgeous borders (available through Wal-Mart developing machine.) The skit cast has the Rising Star border. The carolers look like a Xmas card. The Diamond Girls look as if they are in a fashion magazine. The frames at Wal-Mart were too expensive, but I got plexiglass frames at Michael's @ 30% off. The kids are going to be impressed with the pictures and the parents will be, too. The rest of the groups are going to be after me to take their pictures, though, which will make it easier to get them to pose for me. =.)
March will focus on careers. I have some drawings of professions that I had laminated. I will add paper to each one so the kids can write in their names to the profession they want to pursue. I think the parents will be impressed with that, and it will keep the students goal-oriented. I have speakers coming to speak on Career Day. And I need to start the Pen Pal project this month.
I wish I didn't have to do the extra paperwork, but I do a lot for the kids. The paperwork part of my job may be a lot, but I deserve to give myself credit for at least some of the things I do. =.)