Body Blues

                                            

   When I had a job, I always felt like a wind-up toy that was wound up too tight. I kept doing things very fast, as if someone had pushed the quick forward button on the TV set. But now... I feel as if I am living my life in slow motion... or did someone just hit "pause?" For some unknown  reason,  I catch myself doing things very slowly, now. It is as if I am walking slowly in a dream. This is so unlike me. Suddenly, everything gets me tired.

Something that is also very unusual is that I have broken three glasses within days of each other. Does breaking glass cause bad luck?! Lord knows I have had my share of misfortune in my life lately. I thank God that I haven't broken the glasses while I am washing dishes or cut my hands or my feet from the glass. I can't even remember how long ago it was that I broke a glass while I was washing dishes. I think it was at least 30 years ago.

So... I got up this morning and packed up the broken glass and the vacuum cleaner that died and headed to the garbage dumpster. I was really surprised to see that the dumpster was not packed. These people always pack it to the brim, and there are usually lots of flies and cats jumping in and out of the dumpster. I guess the garbage guy was here yesterday. I have lived here for how many years, and I still do not know when the garbage man comes?! That just goes to show that it is not something that is of priority to me. I don't worry about garbage day. I just take the garbage out, as needed.

    As I walked out into the morning air, I looked up  at the sky and the full moon was big and round in the West, with a soft fog of light around it. It was breath-taking! I wasn't dressed to go for a walk, and I was wearing my chinese shoes instead of tennis shoes, but the moon called out to me for a walk, and so, I did.

How I miss my moonlit walks with God, but the pains in my joints in my body forced me to take a break... too long of a break, if you ask me...  I only walked four laps, but it was nice walk, and a wonderful way to start my day.

   I made this tag animated, but for some reason, it would not upload onto my server, so I added it to this entry non-animated. I think it still looks ok...

As I was returning to my apartment, I couldn't help but notice how the morning dew softly kissed the leaves of grass and other foilage. If you do not wake up early enough to see the dew, you will miss it, because it only appears in the wee hours of the morning, and then, it disappears as if it never was...

I have no idea why I keep dropping things. Sometimes, things just fall all by themselves. It is really strange. Usually, it only happens at home, but lately, it has also been happening wherever I go... at the store... anywhere. It is frustrating, having to bend over to pick up stuff all the time, and sometimes, it is especially hard because of my back problems... Sometimes, I wonder if God is using his sense of humor to get me to do some exercise!

       Wearing shoes has also taken a toll. I have so many shoes, but lately, I cannot wear most of them, because my feet and ankles swell up from water retention. I hate having to wear shoes that are too big for me, but it is hard to find wide shoes that are stylish. Most shoes are not wide enough but if I go a size up, they are too long, so they keep slipping out, even  tennis shoes. What's with that?! Of course, it is hard also hard when you wear one sizein the morning and a different size later in the day.

In my youth, I used to love to wear those high stillettos when I would hit the dance floor. Oh, the memories of beautiful ruched dresses, a black oriental dress with slit sides, a long black skirt worn with a black and white checkered shirt and two black belts, fishnet pantyhose and black patent stilleto pumps! And then, there was my colorful spaghetti strap dress that was featured in one of the dance movies, etc. I didn't have a lot of outfits, but all of them were carefully selected. How I miss all those beautiful dresses, but most of all, I miss looking hot in them! 

   Once upon a time, I ran into a man who swore that he had seen me somewhere...  "You used to do something very athletic," he said. I mentioned that I used to jog at the track and that I used to lift weights. "No, that's not it," he said, and then he surprised me by saying that I used to dance!

It's funny, but I never thought of dancing as athletic. I never was one of those people who would go dancing all the time. I would try to go every Friday or Saturday, but usually, I would only show up two or three times a month, which is good, because that way, my dancing outfits didn't reveal that I really had only a few to choose from!

Dancing today is not what it was then. I don't like the way people dance with their butts in each others faces. To me, it looks really perverted and gross, and the outfits that they wear are not stylish or sexy. They are just plain slutty. There is a big difference between sexy and slutty.

I know people put disco down, but dancing disco was an art, and dressing disco was an art. Not many people could do it.

I was fortunate to find an older anglo gentleman who was a good dancing partner for me. When we danced, people noticed. I always wondered why the latin guys would make remarks that I only dated white guys. It wasn't that I dated white guys. It was that my dancing partner waswhite! If the latin guys could dance, I would have had a latin partner!!

But when Roger wasn't around, I was no stranger to the dance floor! It never ceases to amaze me how the guys kept me on the dance floor. If they were tired when the music stopped, another guy would just jump in to dance with me! Boy, did I get my exercise! 

There was also a black guy who was known as the king of disco in my town. He always wanted me to dance with him professionally. Just think of all the trophies I could have had! That was a mistake not to do it, but I was happy just to dance with him, because he was a terrific dancer. He used to always tell his mother that he couldn't understand why I didn't want to marry him. LOL @ the Tyler Perry in my life... 

I also thought it was funny that this girl used to call me the Dancing Queen. I never paid attention to who was watching me... I just danced. Life should be like that. No matter what life hands us, we should just dance through it...

I thank the Lord that in my youth, I never had a sit-down life. I have so many wonderful and juicy memories. God gave us memories so that we could have roses in December...

I wish my body was more energetic. I wish my body still had all that stamina. I had a body that just wouldn't quit! I thank my body for getting me this far. Yes, my body has been through a lot... all those falls and that car accident when I died and came back to life...

In reality, I should be living my life as a disabled person, but I am grateful that I am not. As much as my body has suffered and continues to torment me from time to time with it's aches and pains, my body is still standing.