Relationships

           

Yesterday, I started out the day with a student who is new to my program. I presented her with a vision voucher and provided her with the details, times, etc, of the places where she could go to get these services. The student didn't flick an eyelash when I told her that the exam and the glasses would be free, and she didn't seem very appreciative. Maybe she will be different after she gets the glasses. I hope she will follow through, because she has to put her face on the monitor to see the computer. I would categorize that as blind as a bat!

                                

On Tuesday, another student (S) came in wearing a really bad pair of pants that looked as if they had been mended and re-mended to hold them together, but there was also a very large hole about the size of a fist on her upper thigh that exposed her thigh and the zipper would not stay up. S is a very tall, very large girl. Sometime back, her sisters told me that S missed school because she didnt have pants to wear, but they were laughing, so I thought they were joking until I saw what she was wearing on Tuesday.

S also has problems with Truancy court. I made the mistake of emailing the vice principal who goes to truancy court to inform her that S has missed some classes, because she didn't have pants to wear. I was already in the process of getting a gift certificate for her, but the vice principal and the principal forwarded my email to the parental involvement person and they wanted me to go speak with her.

I was already in the process of helping S. I didn't ask the school for help, but the principal felt that I wasn't doing enough.

Well, I went, but it was not pleasant. The parental involvement lady started shooting her mouth off at what a terrible family this was and how her older sister had done this and that, and she just kept going on and on at how she didn't deserve help and would have continued talking her mouth off if I hadn't told her that I had to leave. She seemed upset that I didnt stick around to hear more of her bad mouthing about the family. She says she never takes anybody at their word and she demanded that I should do an indepth investigation and make a home visit, because this family is filthy, etc etc etc.

I don't tell her how to do her job. Why should she try to tell me how to do mine?! Unfortunately, the parental involvement lady has always been very rude to me and doesn't believe in my program. That has never stopped me from being nice to her when I see her, but some people just don't like you, no matter what.

She said that nobody was going to help her or her family, and I pretty much got the idea that she wasn't going to help her either. Whatever her family did has nothing to do with the fact that the girl is outgrowing her clothes.

Oh, God, that was such a stupid mistake to email the vice principal. I will know better next time ~ to take care of things myself, period!

Next thing I know, I am in the middle of talking to S and the secretary comes over to get the student for the counselor NOW.  S came back to tell me that the counselor asked her if she needed clothes and S told her no, because she was too embarrassed. She didnt want to be known as the girl who doesnt come to school because she doesnt have a pair of pants to wear. When I talked to the counselor, the counselor said that there were probably other kids who could use the help instead of her.  

S came back during her lunchtime and told me that the parental involvement lady was very nice to her and took down her sizes, etc. Why was she nice to her after what she told me? Why did she decide to help her when she said she couldn't and wouldn't? 

This girl's mom died of cancer. There is no father in the picture. The older sister is in Wyoming (thank God). She is being raised by her 23 year old brother who has a modest salary. In their mind's she is under the custody of the older sister and they get lots of money. NOT!

So then, I finally reach my boss and he wants us to meet at WM after school on Monday so our program can help her with $100 worth of clothes. I think that is good; don't you? What I think is best, however, is that what I am offering her is from the heart. What the parental involvement lady is doing is not. I don't think I would want anything from anybody who didn't have my best interest in mind.

Working with difficult people is very frustrating, but it is an important part of my job. Throughout life, you are always going to find people who don't like you for whatever reason. Maybe just because their friend doesn't like you. Maybe because they don't like to see people with smiles on their faces. Who knows and who cares. Maintaining your cool , watching how you handle things, and being super careful about what you write in an email is crucial. It is hard enough to just to prove yourself at your job. Mess up on any of that, and you will have trouble at your job. 

I hope I didn't mess up.